Observing second and third graders in sewing class is particularly interesting as the class of eight is entirely composed of girls. Afterschool lends a certain casual tone to friendships as there isn’t any teacher there chiding students to keep quiet or stop their chattering. They feel a freedom to speak as if there were no adult present. The teacher is not called Mrs. or Mr. so they don’t seem to hold up the same protocol as they would for a classroom teacher.
On this day R., A., and N., got into a discussion that led to the taking of sides, the calling of names, and was an example of how girls can to turn on each other, using their manipulative skills to pit friend against friend for the slightest of infraction. R. who is usually the most rambunctious of the group has a hard time keeping her voice down and remaining physically quiet. A., her buddy, usually sits on the same side of the table and confides in R. A discussion started about how N. was born in Mexico.
“Was your mom pregnant when you got to Mexico?”
“You don’t look Mexican.”
“Is your family Mexican?”
N., who is Caucasian never explained the circumstances behind her birth, but seemed proud of being Mexican. She tried to explain that you don’t have to be typical Hispanic Mexican to be Mexican. This led to an argument, never using racial profiles or slurs but at the end of the conversation R. and A. had taken sides. N. was labeled as “weird” by the two girls. The teacher, in an effort to break up the discussion and quiet R. announced it would be silent for the next 5 minutes. N. was clearly agitated over the label of being different, even though she looks the same and the others with fair hair, skin and eyes.
R. was clearly the dominant personality and had A. there to back her up and take her side. N., being on the other side of the table with the younger kids had no strong personalities to back her up. R. used her loud jovial personality to joke to the younger girls, winning them over to her side of the discussion, leaving the more quiet N. feeling isolated and angry with the turn of events.
The 5 minutes of quiet time and teachers admonishments to turn back to their projects seemed to work. Soon clean up began and took the focus to something else.
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